Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards)

emilyegg

um......... i'm lost for words

emilyegg

Teenage Son has been asking about the Birds and the Bees...as the subject has arisen at his School. Thought it might be a non-vulgar idea to use playing cards as a guide, so have kicked him off with the following....




Man and Wife....








Female-Female couple...........









Male-Male Couple.........(or Brokeback Mountain for Advanced Learners)








3 some..........









Rafa Miyagi..............(just for reference, not implying that he is a solo-artist)



Please add some more to help me out......BUT KEEP IT CLEAN

BlackFish3

if hes a teenager surely he should already know??? wow he must of led a sheltered life ahaha

pod1

too young for the 69 i suppose!!!

emilyegg

In Response to Re: Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards):

if hes a teenager surely he should already know??? wow he must of led a sheltered life ahaha
Posted by BlackFish3

He`s led a PS3 life Blackfish3 lol ;0)

ACESOVER8s

Doesn't a pair of Queens also signify A male - male couple ?

emilyegg

In Response to Re: Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards):

Doesn't a pair of Queens also signify A male - male couple ?
Posted by ACESOVER8s

Good Point.....I should use the Red Queens (for females) and maybe put some Leathers and a Moustache on one of the Black Queens ;0)...Maybe even a Village People type Cop Helmet as well.

labrat64

Surprised you haven't referenced TK's favourite hand 4-K.

Action_Dan

It's all about Jack-King off...

emilyegg

In Response to Re: Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards):

It's all about Jack-King off...
Posted by Action_Dan

GOOD WORK. Thanks







CONFIRMED Single-Male enthusiast.

emilyegg

In Response to Re: Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards):

Surprised you haven't referenced TK's favourite hand 4-K.
Posted by labrat64

Will Investigate this in due course Ian. 4-KING may fall into the "Happy Shopper" category. May need to contact TK for clarification.

unknown_username

 
"hahaa"   Love it  Emilyegg.. )    

    Some non-sex-specific nicknames will also cause more offence to a woman than a man.
"Mongrel" (K9o), and "German Virgin" (99) for example, .......whilst "crabs" (33) .. is probably an equally offensive slur.
Unless of course you dealt the cards, in which case you can then diffuse the situation by apologising for 'giving them crabs'. And Please ,dont tell anyone I gave yopu these !! 
(Note to self: must buy the Itchy & Scratchy DVD in April).
 

Bromley023

Hahahahahahhaha

This is the funniest thread I have read in ages!! Good work emilyegg!!!

My advice would be to stay away from the Jokers and don't be seduced by the AA ... they inevitably get your hopes up of a big result but end up screwing you over!!!

Mrs B

AIRWALKER

In Response to Re: Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards):

Doesn't a pair of Queens also signify A male - male couple ?
Posted by ACESOVER8s

lol.. n1

emilyegg

In Response to Re: Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards):

  "hahaa"   Love it  Emilyegg.. )         Some non-sex-specific nicknames will also cause more offence to a woman than a man. "Mongrel" (K9o), and "German Virgin" (99) for example, .......whilst "crabs" (33) .. is probably an equally offensive slur. Unless of course you dealt the cards, in which case you can then diffuse the situation by apologising for 'giving them crabs'. And Please ,dont tell anyone I gave yopu these !!  ( Note to self: must buy the Itchy & Scratchy DVD in April ).  
Posted by bennydip2

Love it Benny...especially the "German Virgin" pmsl.

The Boy is learning quickly, so I am cranking it up a notch now.......







Happy Shopper (anything will do)









Gang Bang










Harem










Another 3 some (sometimes known as a Spit Roast)

emilyegg

In Response to Re: Explaining the Birds and the Bees (using playing cards):

Hahahahahahhaha This is the funniest thread I have read in ages!! Good work emilyegg!!! My advice would be to stay away from the Jokers and don't be seduced by the AA ... they inevitably get your hopes up of a big result but end up screwing you over!!! Mrs B
Posted by Bromley023

Excellent Work Mrs B. Thank You.







Players....Smoothies....Cads....et cetera

emilyegg

With thanks to Benny......





"German Virgin"