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MP`s, the things they say............and what they REALLY mean

emilyeggemilyegg
edited May 2010 in The Shed
To celebrate (not) election week and all the lies we will be fed until the big day, lets translate the cack that we hear from the MP`s who are actually in their constituencies as often as snow.

Will get the ball rolling with this all-party, timeless classic......

WHAT THEY SAY........."We Will Improve Efficiency"

WHAT THEY REALLY MEAN..........."Job Cuts"
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Comments

  • AIRWALKERAIRWALKER
    edited May 2010
    We must put systems in place to control immigration.

     TRANSLATES AS.............We will do absolutely nothing about it whatsoever and if you moan about it your bigots.

    We will have an enquiry.

    TRANSLATES AS...........Lets waste a couple of million quid sweeping this under the carpet, sack absolutely nobody then publish the lessons learned and do what we should have been doing in the first place.

    My right honourable friend.

    TRANSLATES AS..............That dishonourable lying, fiddling, scumbag over there.

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  • lucy4lucy4
    edited May 2010
    THEY SAY we are all going to have to tighten our belts & make sacrifices to get through this.
    THEY MEAN you ordinary people are gonna suffer,it aint gonna affect me in the slightest now where did i put my bollinger.

    lying scumbags
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2010
    They say I got in to politics to serve the people. They mean I got in to politics to improve my bank balance!
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  • lozgolozgo
    edited May 2010
    they say - i absolutely do not take cash for questions
    they mean - unless i get offered enough


    they say - you see my expenses are all legal
    they mean - yesss i've found another loophole
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  • emilyeggemilyegg
    edited May 2010
    They Say.............Public services WILL NOT be cut.

    They Mean..........Your council tax WILL be going up again.
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  • AIRWALKERAIRWALKER
    edited May 2010
    They say.....In real terms spending has gone up.
    They mean.... lies, damn lies and statistics.

    They say......We have to do something about 'binge drinking'
    They mean...Nice excuse to tax alcohol to death.


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  • emilyeggemilyegg
    edited May 2010
    They Say...........Your vote CAN make the all the Difference.

    They Mean........PLEASE vote for me, I am siht-scared that my life of luxury as an MP may be drawing to a close.
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  • lozgolozgo
    edited May 2010
    they say.....being an mp is all work, work, work
    they mean....i will WORK at improving my bank balance, i will WORK at finding new ways to spend time in beautiful foriegn locations, and will WORK at rembering where all the skeletons are hidden for my bestselling 'dish the dirt' novel
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