PURCHASING AREA 51

phil12uk

I have 2 x used toilet rolls, any empty box of Frosties and a scratched DVD of Bod. I want in this consortium before rebuys come in!

unknown_username

Pillowman and his backers,

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

In my official capacity as Father Vaigret in service to the Poker God I can advise you that after a long conclave with much white smoke I have been able to talk to the almighty one. He advised that from now on all plays will go as they should and their will be no more bad beats. Only the good players will win and the fish will be fed to the five thousand.

Therefore AREA 51 will become obsolete and advertising revenue will drop significantly. 

Save your money , matchsticks, toilet rolls et al and invest in 

POKER PARADISE

The new nirvana, STOP SHOUTING PILL, for money making 

 

PILLOWMAN

DEAR FATHER V , AS ALWAYS THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONCERN . PLEASE DON'T BE EMBARRASSED BUT UNFORTUNATELY YOU DIDN'T RECEIVE THE LATEST UPDATE . I WAS JUST HAVING A LATE SUPPER WITH YOUR ESTEEMED COLLEAGUE FATHER D . ITS SEEMS THAT THE NEW CHANGES ONLY APPLY TO LIVE GAMES . THEREFORE WE WILL STILL CONTINUE IN OUR QUEST TO PURCHASE AREA 51. MY DEAR FRIEND , A LITTLE INVESTMENT BY YOUR GOOD SELF WOULD BE VERY WELCOME . OBVIOUSLY , THIS COULD BE ARRANGED WITHOUT THE WIDER PUBLIC EVER KNOWING . LETS MEET FOR LUNCH  TO DISCUSS THIS FURTHER , MY SECRETARY WILL BE IN TOUCH . GOD BLESS YOU .                     

unknown_username

Dear Pill,

Thank you for the update but I'm afraid i outrank Father D in poker matters. However your invite for a meet and possible sponsorship of your endeavours sounds exciting.
Look forward to welcoming you to my confessional box where we can keep all our little dealings secret.  

BlackFish3

Do you take ugandan dollars?

IRISHROVER

i can offer you a cleaner and tea lady ,

well kinda lady for area51 ,

she has had  only 1 owner,

a bit of mileage on the clock granted ,

i have been trying to unload her  somewhere now for quiet awhile,

so if your interested the wifey is available ,

i have her bags packed and she's on standby,

but hurry up with your decision ,

its raining outside ,

and you don't want her wetting all over area 51.

 
p.s. if you don't hear from me again m8y ,

that's means she has seen this post,

send father vaig over to give me my last blessing .

oynutter

I want 250 shares for my full and complete, unopened tin of ambrosia creamed rice!---no orffers---you know it makes cents!

unknown_username

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51:

I want 250 shares for my full and complete, unopened tin of ambrosia creamed rice!---no orffers---you know it makes cents!
Posted by oynutter

HAH! what a puddin'

unknown_username

Coming Irish, bible in hand

apollo_11

All I could offer is two empty Baked Bean cans and half a mouldy loaf.
I hope this is enough to get me in.

unknown_username

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51:

''Coming Irish, bible in hand''
Posted by vaigret

I know that joke....great punchline!

IRISHROVER

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51:

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51 : I know that joke....great punchline!
Posted by elsadog

 you dirty dirty dog you down boy .

unknown_username

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51:

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51 :  you dirty dirty dog you down boy .
Posted by IRISHROVER

Don't know why but this reminds me of the two dogs in the vets waiting room. Big dog asks what the little dog is in for. Little dog explains that he's mated with next doors poodle and he's in for the snip. Little dog asks the big dog what he's in for. Big dog says that yesterday he was in the bathroom watching his mistress shower. He went on to say, that at one point she dropped the soap and bent over to pick it up, and he just couldn't resist.....he was in like a shot. Little dog says I suppose your here for the same thing as me then? Big dog says no ........ I'm here to have my claws clipped.

MereNovice

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51:

In Response to Re: PURCHASING AREA 51 : Don't know why but this reminds me of the two dogs in the vets waiting room. Big dog asks what the little dog is in for. Little dog explains that he's mated with next doors poodle and he's in for the snip. Little dog asks the big dog what he's in for. Big dog says that yesterday he was in the bathroom watching his mistress shower. He went on to say, that at one point she dropped the soap and bent over to pick it up, and he just couldn't resist.....he was in like a shot. Little dog says I suppose your here for the same thing as me then? Big dog says no ........ I'm here to have my claws clipped.
Posted by elsadog

[ ] This will still be here on Monday.

unknown_username

Great Joke Elsa

Although as a man of the cloth I dont know whether I should have read it.