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Ask Team Hitman & HitPup!!
Where does your lap go when you stand up ?
Comments
I Have been inspired to start my own, cause HitWife says, ...and I quote....
"HitMan!! you Know alot of S--T, about alot of S--T, but have absolutely NO common sense!!!"
AND...As we all Know, I didna know Much about poker, SO The Shed is the perfect home for my inspired idea!!
I & Hitpup will answer questions on ANYTHING, Within, or without, Reason !! Most answers will be prob incorrect, some may be funny, and most May be offensive, BUT WE WILL ANSWER !! ya get the picture!
We reserve the right, if stuck to consult mentors Del, Maxally, Leroy Jenkins, RiverDohh & Rich Orford of course, and if you are happy with your answer it will only cost you a drink in either Al's Bar or the soon to be re-opened Del's Bar !!
apologies in advance for any offence hopefully taken, We intend to Walk the Line, but not step over LOLOL
"Only a Scotsman would worry about Losing something of such lil' value, so stop bein so tight & just sit back down Jock !!"
HitMan says...
"That Hitpup does make me LOL!!
Truth be told its still there, just now its vertical instead of horizontal !! But nice first question!!"
p.s good thread.
"Easy, depends on the wood chuck, if the wood chuck can't chuck wood, then the answer of woodchuck chucked wood is Zero!!
... But if the wood chuck can chuck wood then all ya gotta do is watch the wood chuck chuckin wood, and count how much wood the wood chuck has chucked, pretty simples really!!"
HitMan says....
"Bit sharper please Kiwi, HitPup wouldna wanna see ya go the same way as the Dodo, dear Kiwi"
Hmmmmm, more difficult ...but the answer lies in this riddle........
" How many good threads can a skymod chuck, if a skymod can chuck good threads"
LOL, OOPPSSS, What is that graffitti on the wall...it says.....
" The writin is on the wall"
What can it mean ?
Why isn't the Moon a big lump of Cheese. Why do Policemen have Whistles and never blow them. Why...
" Why.....WHY.......WHY DONCHA GET YA T.I.T.S OUT FOR THE LADS"...
STOP NAUGHTY HITPUP !!! GET IN YA BASKET !!
Sorry logdon, Hitpup dont' handle pressure well, but normally he only bites, maybe he was a bit exited about your up & comin show at Al's bar, am sure i'll control him then!!
BUT to make it up to u, can i invite you & lucy4 to be the female mentors on this new thread, am sure you are Big Enuf [phnarrr,phnarr] to take him with a BIG LOL !!
Hitpup says sorry, and if u accept his apology, i'll give him back his pig's ear !
thanks in advance [hopefully]
The Hitman
"easy, Iambic pentameter!!"
Hitpup says,
"LOL this is correct as well, but funnier"
I have a cat that keeps sihtting at the bottom of my garden.
I tried one of them sonic repellent things, but some cheeky so-and-so (or cat) nicked it.
In your experience, what is the best way of dealing with the cat without shooting it?
Thanks in advance.
" Shooting is the easy, but 'infeline' way of dealin with this awkward situation, diplomacy & negotiation may be the way forward here!!
Hitpup suggests a saucer of milk with a note saying, 'Don't siht in ma garden ya p ussy or else', may help!
Those sonic things aint no good, we've seen cats sellin loads of them at cat car boot sales, to people, to scare off moles, jasper carrotts always buyin them & mothballs!!"
GL RD
Hi Hitman.....great thread (ish) mate.
My question to you Sir is this...
You were a huge star in the eighties with your TV show, HITMAN and HER. I used to come home nissed as pewt very often in them days and would always put your show on to chill out. You have gone onto poker stardom but please tell me what happened to HER??
Many thanks.....AL the landlord from next door.
"scratch them for him, that should sort it out for 20mins 0r 2, peace & love Man!!
" If you can't stop, don't try!! How about adding some flavour to the brew tho, that will make you Sooo popular at work and at the poker tables, try some pickled Eggs, find some good ones in Al's bar, also Coca-cola, NO ICE, with a couple of pickled Onions floatin, can be very flavorsome for the other end!! Dress & act like the Mad Lil' cop from Hill Street Blues, who used to bite people, that should really make you popular SB !!"
HitMan says....
" If you take HitPups advice, you will find that, at live poker tables, the oppo's range will increase drastically, as well as thier 'away' time, press home this advantage while the 'wind 'is up so to speak !!"
"hmmmmmmm, there has been much conjecture on this subject Bandini, those from a lower end of the food chain are incorrect in using the term 'a group of planks', both me & HitMan like the term coined by the 'intellegensia', which is a 'group of Hero's' !! ie 'look there is a 'Hero's' of Men in Pink Suits!! It does work on a higher level !!"
HitMan says....
" I understand, & in fact don't mind, the use of 'planks' in this case, actually i hear it alot...funny that "
Back in those days, I was called Pete, My gorgeous partner had the alias Michaela, we have both moved on since then, but hope to be re-united soon!!
She moved on to the poker world, reverted to her natural deep brunnette coloring and took on the name Lisa, she had already established herself, and has paved the way for a re-union show, to be aired soon, [negotiations on goin], in fact we are lookin for a venue for a trial run, theme bein poker, fun, drinks & a Bar, Know anywhere?
We Have had a couple of practice runs, to whey public opinion on costume etc, consensus seems to be Red for Her, & Pink for Me, Whadaya reckon??
HitPup says..................
" GGRRRRRRR, Whadaya think i am just a DonkPup!!! Rite in layhumans terms for the audience!!
I like to think in food terms cause Hitwife & HitMan feed me so well out of love, so you donkhumans can understand, i will lay it out as an 'a la carte' menu...so to speak..............
MENUYour consciousness affects the behaviour of subatomic particles- or -Particles move backwards as well as forwards in time and appear in all possible places at once- or - The universe is splitting, every Planck-time (10 E-43 seconds) into billions of parallel universes- or -The universe is interconnected with faster-than-light transfers of information----Full English BreakfastCoffee or Tea
I thank you, GRRRRRR"
HitMan says.... "Wow..what a clever li' Pup"
"Over to you DAD"
Hitman says.....
" ok HitPup am on it.....
...Pink was SOOOOO 2009 Dahrling, but i do personally like the illuminous idea, maybe for the WSOP !!"
HitPup says.....
" NO!! For a pigs ear or two, listen!! Make sure you got several insurance policies first, that all can't be traced or connected, the go for a drink & play 8pm tourney on ur laptop in Al's bar in front of several trusted witnesses' & leave the rest to me,......also.................. if she's got big knockers maybe consider a reconciliation first"
Hitman says...
"that Pup is so proffesional, and he never misses with that PupDragonov"