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HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT

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  • loonytoonsloonytoons
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : I already have a dangerous snake!!!
    Posted by 67Bhoys
    I've heard, its one of those rare 'miniature' ones, is it a bonsai willy lol
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : I've heard, its one of those rare 'miniature' ones, is it a bonsai willy lol
    Posted by loonytoons
    You nurture it for twenty years and it's still the same size.!
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  • loonytoonsloonytoons
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : You nurture it for twenty years and it's still the same size.!
    Posted by logdon
    but does it still fit like a glove?
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : You nurture it for twenty years and it's still the same size.!
    Posted by logdon
    If it's still the same size, you obviously have problems with your technique.  With the proper care and attention, it should at least treble in size!!
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
    If you look down you will see its proper size .?  ops where is it.!!
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    Found it, it was tucked in the top of my ankle sock
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  • loonytoonsloonytoons
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    Found it, it was tucked in the top of my ankle sock
    Posted by 67Bhoys
    you must be a dwarf
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : you must be a dwarf
    Posted by loonytoons
    Fee FI Fo Fum
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
     Well girls take no notice of the silly men talking about the smallest thing in the World. The biggest is their Ego.!   Now listen and concentrate.  This is a tried and tested foolproof way to get rid of Hubby.  We girls are more Subtle than men when it comes to methods of disposal. We prefer Poison's and what better one than natural food. Yes, while driving to the shops I noticed some Toadstools by the side of the road and knowing how much Hubby loves his Mushrooms.  ...........   Well , Police Officer I sent Hubby to the Shops to get Mushrooms for his Dinner and the Cheapskate trying to save money picked his own from the fields across the road.  How was I to know they were Poisonous.  "Sob Sob I will so miss him". he he?
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
     Well girls take no notice of the silly men talking about the smallest thing in the World. The biggest is their Ego.!   Now listen and concentrate.  This is a tried and tested foolproof way to get rid of Hubby.  We girls are more Subtle than men when it comes to methods of disposal. We prefer Poison's and what better one than natural food. Yes, while driving to the shops I noticed some Toadstools by the side of the road and knowing how much Hubby loves his Mushrooms.  ...........   Well , Police Officer I sent Hubby to the Shops to get Mushrooms for his Dinner and the Cheapskate trying to save money picked his own from the fields across the road.  How was I to know they were Poisonous.  "Sob Sob I will so miss him". he he?
    Posted by logdon
    Very sneaky, but unfortunately i don't like mushrooms.  So my darling wife will need to come up with another plan. I don't call it subtle either, boring more like, I mean we had all sorts of dramatic endings planned for you girls, and the best you can come up with is Paige thinking us to death and youself going on a nature ramble to pick mushrooms. 

    Come on girls get a grip!!!
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
     Or ..... "Being the Black Widow." I will enlist the help of my overseas cousins from Australia. Yep   While staying with Friends we encountered some white back Spiders in our Hire car. I accidentally put them there and I told Hubby they were harmless ...... its the Red back that's poisonous.  Sadly the anti venom was administered to late as I took the Long Route to Hospital.   
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : Very sneaky, but unfortunately i don't like mushrooms.  So my darling wife will need to come up with another plan. I don't call it subtle either, boring more like, I mean we had all sorts of dramatic endings planned for you girls, and the best you can come up with is Paige thinking us to death and youself going on a nature ramble to pick mushrooms.  Come on girls get a grip!!!
    Posted by 67Bhoys
    So you would push her under a TK  with C.T.V watching you.?
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : So you would push her under a TK  with C.T.V watching you.?
    Posted by logdon
    I don't think any poor girl deserves being pushed under Tikay. 
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  • lucy4lucy4
    edited July 2011
    What's with all the plans, you`ve only gotta look at the papers to know that. 1, A man kills his wife he gets 20 years minimum, no matter what the circumstances were, I.E sha ging his best mate, no reason for it says the judge. 2, A woman wants out of the marriage, she could string him up and torture him for 10 years but when she gets found out, she blames her hormones, and walks away with a suspended sentence. Only to marry another unsuspecting mug.
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    What's with all the plans, you`ve only gotta look at the papers to know that. 1, A man kills his wife he gets 20 years minimum, no matter what the circumstances were, I.E sha ging his best mate, no reason for it says the judge. 2, A woman wants out of the marriage, she could string him up and torture him for 10 years but when she gets found out, she blames her hormones, and walks away with a suspended sentence. Only to marry another unsuspecting mug.
    Posted by lucy4
    Oh yes Americans can plead the 5th ammendment, and women can blame it all on the hormones.  As for the stringing up bit, are you Cynthia Payne??
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
     He really loves his Chinese Food and you decide to have a Romantic evening in and cook his favourite "Puffer Fish" but sadly you forgot to remove the Poisonous bit.   Ops silly hubby he prepared it for me Officer of the Lawr.! 
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
    Poisons are the silent Ninja in the night doing your dastardly deed with eloquence and precision.   

    Men want to use a tyre wrench.!  
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
     He really loves his Chinese Food and you decide to have a Romantic evening in and cook his favourite "Puffer Fish" but sadly you forgot to remove the Poisonous bit.   Ops silly hubby he prepared it for me Officer of the Lawr.! 
    Posted by logdon
    Poison is a bit boring though, you have to admit..  Not very exciting is it???  No blood, no gore.  You could have him under the car fixing it when the jack accidently slips.  Splatt, blood, gore, broken bones, the lot.  And a nice smudge on your driveway for months to remind you how you did it.
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : Poison is a bit boring though, you have to admit..  Not very exciting is it???  No blood, no gore.  You could have him under the car fixing it when the jack accidently slips.  Splatt, blood, gore, broken bones, the lot.  And a nice smudge on your driveway for months to remind you how you did it.
    Posted by 67Bhoys
    Sorry Dipstick  he could recover.?
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : Sorry Dipstick  he could recover.?
    Posted by logdon
    Dipstick accidently through the heart, now your thinking!!
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : Dipstick accidently through the heart, now your thinking!!
    Posted by 67Bhoys
    Yep,   "Thinking Mans Crumpet Me," always have been and now Domed to the Sky Shed.?
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  • paige55paige55
    edited July 2011

    DEXTER arrives in great BRITAIN this morning hope you no he is a serial killer

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  • spornybolspornybol
    edited July 2011
    MY WIFE IS FOR HIRE IF YOU WISH YOUR HUSBAND KILLED,


    SHE`LL COOK FOR HIM AND IF SHE DON`T SET KITCHEN ON FIRE FIRST SHE`LL POISON HIM
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  • paige55paige55
    edited July 2011
    tell all there male friends they read mills and boon books,and it is the only present they want for birthdays and Christmas.dont think they would ever recover from the ridicule,ha,ha,ha,
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  • HITMAN_RVHITMAN_RV
    edited July 2011
    Brilliant thread, Well done all !!

    5 mins well spent, LOL!!!


    Long Live The Shed!!
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  • paige55paige55
    edited July 2011
    long live the shed,and so say all off us HITMAN RV :):):)
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  • paige55paige55
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : Oh yes Americans can plead the 5th ammendment, and women can blame it all on the hormones.  As for the stringing up bit, are you Cynthia Payne??
    Posted by 67Bhoys
    HORMONES, HORMONES, WHO  MENTSIONED THEM NOW I HAVE WELL AND TRULY LOST THE POT,MAD I AM MAD, BACK TO THINKING ,THINKING,GEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ NEVER MENTION THAT WORD AGAIN,I WILL NOW HAVE TO OUT SIDE AND WASH THE CAR,MAY RUN YOU OVER.YOU FISH AT THE TABLES YOU DONK, LOOK WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO ME, I CANT EVEN SPEALL MURDDER.MILLS AND BOON ALL NIGHT FOR YOU
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  • logdonlogdon
    edited July 2011
     Well after that performance got me thinking ........ I could have him practice his "Houdini" straight jacket routine and while he's struggling to get out call the Police and say he's escaped from the Mental Institution could you please return him. only for a laugh.!
    Then when he is finally released,  he attacked me Officer and in self defence I accidentally had to kill him.? 
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  • 67Bhoys67Bhoys
    edited July 2011
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT:
    In Response to Re: HOW TO MURDER YOUR HUSBAND AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE AN ACCIDENT : HORMONES, HORMONES, WHO  MENTSIONED THEM NOW I HAVE WELL AND TRULY LOST THE POT,MAD I AM MAD, BACK TO THINKING ,THINKING,GEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ NEVER MENTION THAT WORD AGAIN,I WILL NOW HAVE TO OUT SIDE AND WASH THE CAR,MAY RUN YOU OVER.YOU FISH AT THE TABLES YOU DONK, LOOK WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO ME, I CANT EVEN SPEALL MURDDER.MILLS AND BOON ALL NIGHT FOR YOU
    Posted by paige55
    What word, not
    Hormones!!!
    chin up.  There is always HRT.
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  • paige55paige55
    edited July 2011
    logdon the men on this site, or should we say the mills and boon male reader,s of the novel,s are already in straight jackets, all off them
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