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always a nice feeling afterwards isn't it. well so i'm told lol
keep up the good work buddy.
(* *)
^
dev
just play your 'A game' and you'll be fine.
(* *)
£
dev
1. The most important things in life, are those that you can't buy. Unconditional love, health, happiness, time, true friendship and a sense of meaning.
2. “We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.”
― Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture
Positivity and a positive outlook is contagious. Smile more, it's free! To be honest, it took me a long time to start to work this one out. The more positive and happy you are around others, the more happiness you'll get in return. Some people in this world are just drains, but you'll find a better sense of self-worth and happiness if you view things in a positive slant.
3. Life is like building a wall brick by brick. Some days will be clear skies and rainbows. Some days, you'll be tested by adverse conditions. But every day, you should do you up most to plant that brick as perfectly as you can.
4. Respect your surroundings. Nature, loved ones. We're blessed by the world we live in and unfortunately we often take its beauty for granted.
5. Money is more valuable when you don't have it. Be wise with it! Bottle service isn't as cool as it sounds (even if it lets you bat above your weight).
6. “A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds.”
― Francis Bacon, The Essays
I've been extremely blessed with my upbringing and I can't thank my parents and loved ones enough for providing me with the opportunities that they have. Nonetheless, I'm a firm believer in being able to create your own chances in life. Go out there and make your mark!
7. Self respect is a fundamental aspect of life. If you can't respect yourself, who can you respect? Take pride in your being - from the way you conduct yourself, to your appearance.
8. Be fearless (well not entirely). I've wasted too much time worrying about inconsequential things that I can't control - it's very draining and gets you nowhere. If you don't like something, have the balls to change it without worrying about every little detail. Perhaps most importantly, be willing to embrace and bestow change.
9. Morals. In my opinion, they are often overlooked. To a certain extent, these will be reflected from your upbringing. Just remain open minded! I find utilitarianism a great way to base ones' life. 'The greatest good for the greatest number'. Find your own morals and embrace them.
10.Take calculated risks. One of the things I constantly remind myself, is that at some point, I'll be old. It's inevitable and when I am, the last thing I want to be do is sitting in a chair wondering and asking myself what could have been if I'd have just had the courage to go up to that beautiful girl who was smiling at me, or taken the time to go on an adventure with friends.
11.Acceptance. Be willing to accept that you can't control everything in life. Everyone looks at things differently. Everyone makes mistakes. Learn to see things from others' point of view (even if you don't necessarily agree with it) and learn to forgive yourself for mistakes.
For a somewhat intelligent person, I've done some stupid s*** and put myself and loved ones in situations that I regret. Just remember, for every action, there's a consequence, no matter how seemingly small at the time.
12.Don't take risks you can't afford to lose, and always have a plan B. Remember that a backup is fundamental. I'd have saved myself a great deal of time and sacrifice if I'd figured this one out sooner.
13. “Never let go of a good thing without a fight. Especially if that good thing is a pair of boxing gloves.”
― Jarod Kintz
Have something meaningful to fight for. This could be countless things such as a set of beliefs, a relationship, a career. It'll provide you with a greater sense of self-worth.
14.Think, analyse and ACT. It's all too easy to get caught up in your own little world, so take a step back from time to time. Ask yourself, are you going in the direction you want to be? Unfortunately, it often takes something major to happen before we truly realise what's important in life.
15.What goes up, must come down. Be wary of short term effects. Not just with the abuse of drugs (alcohol, stimulants etc), but with almost everything you can imagine, relationships, eating habits, heaters in Poker - the list really goes on. Don't ride a high expecting it to never end, because at some point it will.
16.Don't be selfish. The world doesn't revolve around you (unless of course you're Mila Kunis, she's amaziiinggggg). In all seriousness, it doesn't - so don't force your viewpoints, beliefs, problems and unhappiness on others. Ultimately, just be balanced because it'll make you become more magnetic.
17. “Dripping water hollows out stone, not through force but through persistence.”
― Ovid
Remember - tomorrow's another day. Some of my greatest breakthroughs have derived from failure, so just be persistent. It just takes one breakthrough for months or even years of work to be worth it.
18. Things happens for a reason. I can't really explain this one, but from my personal experience it truly does, even if it isn't clear at the time.
19. Be happy, graceful and loving but save your heart for that special someone.
My personal favourite of me and my girlfriend
20. Enjoy life. It can be a turbulent ride, but it's really whatever you make it. So carve yourself a beautiful, prosperous, kind, compassionate and loving route.
Thank you for taking the time to read my post. If it was half as meaningful to read as for me to write, post a comment.
Patwalshh
Batting above average, not weight
And yes it would appear that you do happen to know some above average girls.
You should have done pics all that time agoto save you a lot of hassle!
You just got back from holiday?
'A calm sea never made a great sailor'
This blog has helped me to manage the trials and tribulations that we as Poker players go through on a minute to minute basis. I love sharing my experiences with the community - whether it be moments of elation or moments of self-doubt and anguish. In this post, I'll try to outline what I've been occupying myself with over the last few months, and any future plans that I may have in mind. Here goes.
In December, I felt as though I'd made it - I'd gone from playing £50nl under-rolled, to solely multi-tabling £100nl+. I felt as though I'd worked my way up from the bottom and I was deservedly, in my element. Over the course of a two months, my poker results had become better than I could have asked. I had a blossoming relationship with my girlfriend. Life was good. I knew the road ahead wouldn't be easy, but that was okay because I was willing to push through the hard times and reap the rewards of my dedication. Unfortunately it wasn't to be.
Against my better judgement I'd bought new car with my bankroll. Suddenly 95% of my net worth was locked in two assets. I had a £500 to my name. That was no problem I'd worked rolls up from scratch. Time to work hard I told myself. 2013 had other ideas, and the first two months of the year were in simple terms, disgusting. I just couldn't win at cash or DYMs. With dwindling funds, stress from university and a relationship to balance - the unrest caught up with me. I turned to self-destructive behaviours to 'cope' and suddenly, the tables had once again turned.
It can be difficult to accept just how hard you can work for something, months, years of dedication - and it be stripped away before you know it. The demons were starting to get the better of me. I was becoming tilted out of my mind. On the outside, away from the virtual felt I was fine, interacted with people better than I ever have. I decided to take a break, focus on University, focus on securing a job for a placement year and focus on making myself happy. So that exactly what I did. Although the break felt good and overall I was happy, I just couldn't shake away an empty feeling in my stomach - a feeling that I wasn't living up to my potential, that I was just doing the sensible thing. Up to the age of 20, I'd never lived to do the sensible thing, so why should I start now? Nonetheless, I plodded along. Trying to tick the boxes that middle-class life requires. A relationship and a secure job. Those two characteristics couldn't be further from what I felt that I really wanted.
The days turned into weeks, and the weeks into months. I kept my head down, wishing that it could be different. No matter how hard I tried to move on, I couldn't help but feel as though I was going through the motions. Something had to give.
--
To be continued.
As the weeks rolled by and the days grew hotter, the realisation that a 4 month break from university loomed hit me. I asked myself just why I getting so angry at a game I've loved for so long? Looking back, I think it boiled down to two key points. In one sense, I couldn't shake of a feeling of injustice. A sense of complete and utter distain towards bad players that were beating me on the poker table. On the other hand, I was angry at myself for getting the financial and indeed emotion position that I was in. I was happy away from the tables, so why couldn't I be happy on them? I was looking for a quick fix, to chase my losses, take risks that I couldn't afford to lose and hope to hit the magic elixir, the jackpot. Of course, it wasn't to be.
So I turned my back on Poker and focused on dedicating myself to the gym. It was good for my wellbeing and acted as a stress relief. I found solace in it being the one thing you couldn't accidently 'win' at. You couldn't be an average guy and start lifting a considerable weight. Hard work simply yielded consistent and tangible results - there was no variance involved. The more effort you put in, the more you get out. Whether it be in terms of body fat % or the weight you lift. I got strong, I got big and it kept my confidence up.
All the while I was plodding along in a relationship. The girl in question was to me, hands down incredible. The type of girl that has a great sense of humour, a loving persona, she was intelligent, popular, attractive and most importantly low maintenance - nothing was ever too much trouble. I give a huge amount of credit to people who fall in love with someone who's difficult. Of course, we're all difficult at times and have our flaws. I'm referring to the type of people that fall into the more one sided category of that trait. If there's one thing I learnt when I was with her, you can't help who you fall in love with.
Unfortunately for me, she never understood poker. No matter how hard I tried to detail and market the concept, she just couldn't fathom it. Anyone who's had to balance poker with a relationship will know that this will create a divide, no matter how small. After losing confidence in myself through Poker, I regrettably started turning to other means of finding boosts. Nights out with friends lead to somewhat murky behaviour. We all have weaknesses and when we start to crack those weaknesses can turn into major flaws.
Over time I drifted away from her. I just couldn't shake the feeling that she was distracting me from bigger and better things. I felt as though we were both investing an incredible amount of time into something that just wouldn't work. So we broke up.
Today is around a month on from us splitting up. I can hand on heart say that it's worked out better for the both of us. After my relationship ended, I focused on friendships that I had neglected. I focused on making the most of being 20 and being free to do what I wanted, 'without regret or savour'. I'd recently read a book that taught the concept of; turning nothing into something. Without a reasonable amount to invest into myself, I searched for a viable means of getting back on my feet financially. I'm currently on an unpaid placement, gaining work experience, so my options are limited. Not wanting to mix primary friendships with money, I turned to a group of Poker players and requested a stake. Thankfully I was blessed enough to have someone send me enough to get back on the virtual felt - the following day, on a 50/50 profit split.
So that's where I am now. Making the most of being single. Working hard. I read a quote recently that seemed to stick, 'the best way to predict the future is to invent it.' Rather generic I know, but motivating nonetheless.
------------------------------------------------
Thank you for reading my story. I appreciate all replies, be it positive, negative, short or long. I apologise for it being excessively tl;dr and it won't be everyone's cup of tea. I think the best analogy to describe myself that I've heard of comes from my best friend. He said to me, 'Patrick, you're like marmite, people either hate you or love you.'
Who needs a psychiatrist when you have a forum eh?
Patrick Walsh
Be good
Paul
In my last post (granted a month ago) I detailed how I had been staked, and that all in all it was going swimmingly. Variance was a little unkind to me over around a thousand games - but I have since bounced back and I'm very happy with my recent results. All sngs since the start of the stake:
The stake agreement was to initially start with a £250 roll and play until I hit £1,000 profit (I got to keep rakeback along the way) - and we decided a 50/50 profit split. I stuck to that agreement and have sent my backer a healthy profit back. Interestingly, we had a clause in the agreement that meant that once I hit the £1,000 profit mark, me and my backer would end the agreement and I'd play on my own. However, I was entitled to £100 worth of tournament entries and we split all 'scores' 50/50. My results in tournaments the last week have been the case of so close, but so far:
- 3 way split in Rush $11 tournament (vs very difficult FT) for $225
- 3rd in the Mini-BH for £130
- 36th (odd) vs over 1100 in the $26 OMAHA Hi/Lo on FTP
and the result I'm delighted about,
- 70th/791 for a min cash in the 10-GAME $55 on FTP (extremely tough last 175 players)
[The top 100 in Mini-FTOPS are killing me, as I've been so close in the past too]
I'm really happy with how my mixed game ability has improved, so hopefully I can continue to dabble - for another that actually cares my favourite games excluding NLHE are; PLO, PLO 0/8, Triple Draw and Razz.
So this weekend, I have £100 behind me to play the Mini-FTOPs main and some other events. I'm now playing under my own roll on Sky.
I'm back in Bath, and feel really excited to meet some new people (girls). It's been a long but nonetheless productive summer, gym most days and I worked a kill me now 9-5 for real life work experience (wtf is that all about). So it feels great to be back in Bath. On a side-note, I'm meeting the ex-gf today for lunch, so that should be interesting.
Run good.