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Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey [new update]

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  • percival09percival09
    edited May 2012
    I'm in north wales (unfortunately) but I might be transferring to London for year 2!

    Keep up the dym cashes, keeps the roll increasing at a fairly low variance

    I agree cash is the most profitable method of the game on any site, obv on stars the field is much tougher but it's still the same on all sites, if you want to make a good profit in the long run cash is the thing to play!

    100NL HU is pretty sick - I played some reg on stars a year or so ago and he was pretty good, aggro, knows where he is etc... that's a pretty tough and skillful thing to play! I wanna do the same as you, but 6max not HU!
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    I'm in north wales (unfortunately) but I might be transferring to London for year 2! Keep up the dym cashes, keeps the roll increasing at a fairly low variance I agree cash is the most profitable method of the game on any site, obv on stars the field is much tougher but it's still the same on all sites, if you want to make a good profit in the long run cash is the thing to play! 100NL HU is pretty sick - I played some reg on stars a year or so ago and he was pretty good, aggro, knows where he is etc... that's a pretty tough and skillful thing to play! I wanna do the same as you, but 6max not HU!
    Posted by percival09
    Ahh London would be insane, best of luck. 

    I'd really like to branch out from DYMs, but for right now I'm happy with the low variance. HU is a different game entirely. I was playing on stars a couple weeks back and my shove got value called on the turn by a 200nl reg with 10high on a wet board lol. But one day it'd be nice to get some coaching and take a stab at it. 
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  • GREGHOGGGREGHOGG
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey : Thanks Shanxta, nice to have DON regs in this thread.
    Posted by patwalshh
    Not nice to have him on your tables tho is it! :)

    I'm  playing mainly £16.50 and  £22s dyms atm so i think ive been  mainly avoiding you both thankfully lol. my overall ROI at £22 quid and above based on a small sample size of 167 is 15%. i think thats impossible to maintain tho...

    I have not played enough yet at this level  to get a true idea of how successful i am, but tbh there isnt a great deal of difference imo. I did play an £82.50 one last night.. that made me gulp a bit lol

    good luck in your grind Pat, im enjoying this diary...

    GREGHOGG 73$6 $40 22%$417 -N/ASkyPoker<12Mths S30-200 G=H Double or Nothing SNG Only
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey : Not nice to have him on your tables tho is it! :) I'm  playing mainly £22s dyms atm so i think ive been  mainly avoiding you both thankfully lol. my overall ROI at £22 quid and above based on a small sample size of 167 is 15%. i think thats impossible to maintain tho... I have not played enough yet at this level  to get a true idea of how successful i am, but tbh there isnt a great deal of difference imo. I did play an £82.50 one last night.. that made me gulp a bit lol good luck in your grind Pat, im enjoying this diary... GREGHOGG 73 $6 $40 22% $417 - N/A SkyPoker <12Mths S30-200 G=H Double or Nothing SNG Only
    Posted by GREGHOGG
    Not nice indeed! Best of luck in the Dym's Greg. I saw you reg'd in a £16.50 yesterday, but I thought I'd stick with my fishies at the 5s and 10s ha. 

    In terms of the winrate, I've had mine fluxuate a lot. It started at something insane like 15% for both stakes over the first few hundred games. But over a larger sample 2000+ I think your looking at between 3-7%, especially at the higher stakes (depending on how well you table select etc)
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  • GREGHOGGGREGHOGG
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey : Not nice indeed! Best of luck in the Dym's Greg. I saw you reg'd in a £16.50 yesterday, but I thought I'd stick with my fishies at the 5s and 10s ha.  In terms of the winrate, I've had mine fluxuate a lot. It started at something insane like 15% for both stakes over the first few hundred games. But over a larger sample 2000+ I think your looking at between 3-7%, especially at the higher stakes (depending on how well you table select etc)
    Posted by patwalshh
    Thanks mate, and gl to u too.

    My ROI is about 6% for lower stakes based on a proper sample of 4k games.. 
     
    and  its at 12% for everything above £16.50 (based on a small sample of 350 games) This is not sustainable though, i would expect it to drop rapidly if i continue to play these levels...

    There are losing players and losing regs  at the £16.50 level plus, if you use scope this allows you to table select a little bit.
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey : Thanks mate, and gl to u too. My ROI is about 6% for lower stakes based on a proper sample of 4k games..    and  its at 12% for everything above £16.50 (based on a small sample of 350 games) This is not sustainable though, i would expect it to drop rapidly if i continue to play these level... There are losing players and losing regs  at the £16.50 level plus, if you use scope this allows you to table select to a small extent.
    Posted by GREGHOGG
    Sounds like you've got your head firmly screwed on regarding expected roi and sample sizes. I'm sure you'll crush. Your right about the regs, some of the games are juicy. I sharkscoped a high stakes DON (£55+) reg the other day, and he was like -$60,000 dollars over 3k games. Incredible. 
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    Decent day so far. Wanted a change from the double or nothings, so I tried a bit of HU. Volume is pretty low, but I'm happy with the results. 




    Graph includes 3rd place in a £4 HU bh. 

    (Having a lot of trouble uploading hand histories so posting as pictures for now)


    Player was being fairly active post flop so standard shove. 



    Blank river, so I felt his value hands are outweighted by his missed draws. 

    --

    Playing the Roller, 12k BH & Mini BH tonight. So hopefully will have some decent results to post tomorrow! 


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  • 68Trebor68Trebor
    edited May 2012

     Problem for you not uploading Hands may be to do with your choice of internet browser. You need to use Internet Explorer if you want to post hand histories.
     Nice read by the way.
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
     Problem for you not uploading Hands may be to do with your choice of internet browser. You need to use Internet Explorer if you want to post hand histories.  Nice read by the way.
    Posted by 68Trebor
    Thanks, I'll try internet explorer. Currently failing with crome atm. 
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    I promised myself I'd update this on the bad days and the good. So here goes. On my last entry, I explained how I had freerolled into the 5k Roller and planned to play the 12k BH and Mini alongside. For once, I just wanted to play good, get  nice cards and not get into tilting situations. None of which, went to plan. 

    --

    Busted early out of the BH after my 1010 got outdrawn by 55 after getting aipf. And to make matters worse, got destroyed by fish in the Roller. Tilting situations, such as them limp calling A6 and outflopping me. Thought I'd give the £22 DYMs a shot and played about 4 of them, along with a few £16.50 DYMs. Running beyond bad and got coolered in so many situations. One scenario was on the bubble of a £22 DYM during 75/150 blinds:

    Reg open shoves <10bb pf. The big stack calls in the sb, and I call in the BB with AA. Board runs out JJxxx and show AA. The sb shows 1010. And the reg with the <10bb stack ships the pot with J10. gnasgknaiosngaiogsnasipngas. 

    Although the session was painful, the £22s are a lot softer than I expected, and seemed to have the same REG/Fish ratio as the £11s/£5.5s. If they ran as often as the £11s I'd definitely play them as my sole game. But right now, that just isn't possible. After that awful session I got tilted and played HU cash. Didn't go well.

    (-£160 for the day)

    ---

    Today I woke up refreshed and ready to grind. Started perfectly and after 12 games was up £40. Even after getting coolered in the HU bh tournament 3 times in a row when I should have won it. 

    But then doomswitch. Had the two most frustrating £5 DON session of my life. Made worse by Skypoker's software completely spazzing out. Games weren't loading and I got blinded out in a few that wouldn't load. However, I phoned the Priority team, and to my surprise, were superb. Refunding me like 2 buy ins, which I thought was very fair.

    At one point it was only after coming back from very average chip stacks and winning the last 5 in a row that saved me from serious harm. Just complete set ups, that make me want to cry. Nevertheless, still a +£ day so I can't complain. #firstworldproblems

    I'm ready to put some serious volume in this weekend. 


    --

    Patwalshh
     



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  • scotty77scotty77
    edited May 2012
    Running beyond bad and got coolered in so many situations. One scenario was on the bubble of a £22 DYM during 75/150 blinds:

    Reg open shoves <10bb pf. The big stack calls in the sb, and I call in the BB with AA. Board runs out JJxxx and show AA. The sb shows 1010. And the reg with the <10bb stack ships the pot with J10. gnasgknaiosngaiogsnasipngas. 

    AA might be a fold on the bubble of a DYM given stacks.  
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  • EvilPinguEvilPingu
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    Running beyond bad and got coolered in so many situations. One scenario was on the bubble of a £22 DYM during 75/150 blinds: Reg open shoves <10bb pf. The big stack calls in the sb, and I call in the BB with AA. Board runs out JJxxx and show AA. The sb shows 1010. And the reg with the <10bb stack ships the pot with J10. gnasgknaiosngaiogsnasipngas.  AA might be a fold on the bubble of a DYM given stacks.  
    Posted by scotty77
    Agree that this may be a spot to fold aces, stick the HH up please :)
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    Sorry but I can't find exact HH. 

    75/150 blinds:

    Utg folds
    Button (winning reg with large shoving range) shoves 1550
    sb (starting stack 5000ish) calls - 1475
    bb hero (starting stack 2500) dealt AA - calls 1400

    --

    I disagree that it's wrong to call aces in this spot. 

    EDIT: This is a fairly similar dilemma of a 9max sng. I understand the payout structures are different. But similar scenario nonetheless

    Full Tilt Poker Game #4110133691: $6 + $0.50 Sit & Go (Turbo) (31220528), Table 1 - 250/500 - No Limit Hold'em - 16:52:29 ET - 2007/11/08
    Seat 1: S_Psycho (1,570)
    Seat 2: floppeyone (4,215)
    Seat 5: fold and repeat (1,850)
    Seat 9: gbones420 (5,865)
    floppeyone posts the small blind of 250
    fold and repeat posts the big blind of 500
    The button is in seat #1
    *** HOLE CARDS ***
    Dealt to floppeyone [As Ac]
    gbones420 raises to 5,865, and is all in
    S_Psycho folds
    floppeyone ? 

    'KK+ is an easy call against any opponent.'


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  • jh16jh16
    edited May 2012
    Tricky one...

    I'm no DYM expert but my thoughts are:

    Folding - you say shover has a wide range. Has big stack been calling many shoves? or still only calling with value hands? Either way you would hope that the big stack has a better average calling range than the wide shoving range of the reg. This alone on the bubble, with a decent stack still, may make it a fold. not sure. 

    If we're playing the hand though, surely this is a rare time in which we want to be re-shoving and creating a side pot. Because... If the big stack wins the hand then we cash anyway, and obviously if we win the hand we cash. However if the original shover wins the main pot and there is no side pot, we're left as the short stack with ~1k chips which is near desperate @ 75/150 I would have said. (and we're going to have, on average, say about 85 percent (as a rough guess) against the big stacks range and we're not exactly going to be given those tasty looking GUARENTEED odds again anytime soon.


    Not sure about the math of it all but would've thought its close either way. Anyway, just my thoughts on the situation. :>
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    thanks for pm pat mate and will keep in mind tx
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  • grantorinograntorino
    edited May 2012
    Haven't read full thread but the last hand you posted fist pump snap
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    Transition

    ---

    Still not running too good at the 5.50s and the downswing is beginning to get to me. To make matters worse due to my recent results, I've lost my sharkscope star. Which after working so hard for, is like a punch in the stomach. I've got exams over the next few weeks, so maybe I should concentrate on them, as opposed to DYM's. 

               
     
    patwalshh
    SkyPoker
    		average profit average stake average roi total profit ability (lol)
    -$0.32
    $7.87
    -4.3%
    -$60.86
    53     		       

    (£5s over the past 7 days - Over 150 of them. Slightly inaccurate I believe)

    Today I made a deposit on a well known Poker site, with the intention of grinding SNG's when I'm free during the day. I just can't get the volume I desire on Skypoker at the moment, and I don't mind multi-tabling at a lower expected ROI (its in $ too, which sucks). The games I've started to play are a different variation of DYM and with 10 players instead of 6. I've had to adjust my opening range, 3 bet range and open shoving range, which is making for some interesting play. 

    There's no doubt that you'll continue see me on the site, but as of right now, I plan on splitting my playing time between the two sites. 


    On a sidenote, after hearing good things, I'm looking to buy diablo 3 in the next few days. If anyone has any experience with the game, give me a shout on what I can expect. 
    --

    patwalshh


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  • GELDYGELDY
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    I've got exams over the next few weeks, 

      On a sidenote I'm looking to buy diablo 3 in the next few days. 

    Posted by patwalshh
    don't do it - please -  wait until after your exams and then treat yourself
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey : don't do it - please -  wait until after your exams and then treat yourself
    Posted by GELDY
    Haha, I've heard it can be ever so slightly addictive.. 
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    So close, but so far

    --

    Although my degree is Business Management, for our first year we had to choose a subject to go along side it. Partly, due to the poor selection of subjects available and partly due to being lazy, I chose one of my former A-Level subjects: Sociology. Today I had my Sociology exam, which was 2 hours long. However, we were allowed to take 500 words of notes in with us, which eased the pain. (without of which, I'd have failed miserably)  

    Poker wise, I played a bunch of DYM style SNGs with little success. However, I did manage to final table a $2 rebuy (500 player cap) . The tournament proved one thing, I suck at MTTs. I just don't have the patience for them. If I had more, I'd have probably got top 3 - But no, sadly I don't. So I got 7th (still good enough for a little over $100). Oh well, good experience nonetheless.

    Played around 10 DYMs on Skypoker. Actually came back from 87.5 chips to cash in one which was nice. My current comeback record is from 70 chips. So if anyone can beat this, please post here. It'd make for some interesting discussion/stories.

    Todays giraffe:


    --

    patwalshh


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  • GREGHOGGGREGHOGG
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    So close, but so far -- Although my degree is Business Management, for our first year we had to choose a subject to go along side it. Partly, due to the poor selection of subjects available and partly due to being lazy, I chose one of my former A-Level subjects: Sociology. Today I had my Sociology exam, which was 2 hours long. However, we were allowed to take 500 words of notes in with us, which eased the pain. (without of which, I'd have failed miserably)   Poker wise, I played a bunch of DYM style SNGs with little success. However, I did manage to final table a $2 rebuy (500 player cap) . The tournament proved one thing, I suck at MTTs. I just don't have the patience for them. If I had more, I'd have probably got top 3 - But no, sadly I don't. So I got 7th (still good enough for a little over $100). Oh well, good experience nonetheless. Played around 10 DYMs on Skypoker. Actually came back from 87.5 chips to cash in one which was nice. My current comeback record is from 70 chips. So if anyone can beat this, please post here. It'd make for some interesting discussion/stories. Todays giraffe: -- patwalshh
    Posted by patwalshh
    I think this is pretty much unbeatable... 8.75 chips! in a dym, click on link and scroll up to OP

    https://www.skypoker.com/secure/poker/sky_lobby?action=show_static&page=poker_community_forums&plckForumPage=ForumDiscussion&plckDiscussionId=Cat%3a57795ac2-1793-4377-b4cf-e124b0f555f4Forum%3adf77f82c-151f-4bea-aae1-fb423dcae1faDiscussion%3afd94eef2-2783-4076-8399-d30af80568d2&plckFindPostKey=Cat:57795ac2-1793-4377-b4cf-e124b0f555f4Forum:df77f82c-151f-4bea-aae1-fb423dcae1faDiscussion:fd94eef2-2783-4076-8399-d30af80568d2Post:cf6bf6bf-99d6-449b-ac6b-f6e078cbc122
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    8.75, no I said 87.5.











    (oh wait, damn that's impressive)
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  • EvilPinguEvilPingu
    edited May 2012
    I left someone with 0.01 chips on the bubble once (DYM), he doubled or tripled up 5 times, had less than 1 chip left still, and one of the other players was all in on the big blind (Not me) and went out. I got some abuse for that, unsurprisingly, but I thought it was hilarious after a few pints :P

    Don't know if that really counts as a comeback though :)
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    I left someone with 0.01 chips on the bubble once (DYM), he doubled or tripled up 5 times, had less than 1 chip left still, and one of the other players was all in on the big blind (Not me) and went out. I got some abuse for that, unsurprisingly, but I thought it was hilarious after a few pints :P Don't know if that really counts as a comeback though :)
    Posted by EvilPingu
    One of those moments that's epic (to everyone but the bubble boy haha)
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    Will post update later this evening :)
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  • Sky_PokerSky_Poker
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey : I think this is pretty much unbeatable... 8.75 chips! in a dym, click on link and scroll up to OP https://www.skypoker.com/secure/poker/sky_lobby?action=show_static&page=poker_community_forums&plckForumPage=ForumDiscussion&plckDiscussionId=Cat%3a57795ac2-1793-4377-b4cf-e124b0f555f4Forum%3adf77f82c-151f-4bea-aae1-fb423dcae1faDiscussion%3afd94eef2-2783-4076-8399-d30af80568d2&plckFindPostKey=Cat:57795ac2-1793-4377-b4cf-e124b0f555f4Forum:df77f82c-151f-4bea-aae1-fb423dcae1faDiscussion:fd94eef2-2783-4076-8399-d30af80568d2Post:cf6bf6bf-99d6-449b-ac6b-f6e078cbc122
    Posted by GREGHOGG
    Wow - awesome.
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In my last entry, I revealed that I had deposited on another site with the intention of grinding a larger volume of SNGs alongside this site. On Sunday I deposited $95, fully expecting the games to be considerably tougher, and full of strong regs. Much to my surprise, they were just that. 

    During the past few days, I've played a HUGE variation of games. From HU tournaments, 6-max hypers, 10-max DYMs, cash (both NL and FL), HU Hypers, MTTs, 6-max turbos, regular HU SNGs. Playing the number of variations I did, made me truly realise just how intricate this game is. How mixed game specialists competently complete at a high level, is unbelivable. How anyone can master NLHE is beyond me. But how anyone can master Razz, PLO/08, Stud and NLHE, whilst playing at the highest level - in a game where the smallest weaknesses are exploited, takes things to another level. 

    I played a huge number of games. After doubling my deposit - I withdrew. Yes the games were incredible and you could play as many tables as you wanted similtaniously. But they just left me feeling empty. On this particular site there were at least 4 strong regulars on a table, constantly pushing edges. Edges, that in my opinion, just weren't there anymore. As amusing as this sounds coming from someone who's played a relatively short period of time online. The games online in general, just aren't what they were. I therefore take my hat off to Skypoker for housing the very essence, that makes Poker - the greatest game in the world. From the discussion, community spirit, strong players, weak players, players from your home town to players across the channel, for the chance of appearing on TV. Such features, that so many of us, including myself, take for granted. 

    For me its back to DYMs, solely on Skypoker. Yes they're monotonous, frustrating and slow. But for now, I can accept the slow pace of DYMs, and hopefully watch my cash for points trickle up and my bankroll grow.

    --

    patwalshh




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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    Positive mental attitude

    --

    Party due to the glorious weather, and partly due to my upcoming uni exam tomorrow, I'm done for the day. Not too much volume, but I'm happy with the results. Seemed to be running okayish on the crutial short stack vs short stack shoves which was nice for a change. 

    Had an interesting DYM. On the bubble, shorterish stack limps. Blinds are relatively high, so I shove. He slowroll calls QQ. I miss. He then goes on to say, 'haha fish' in the chatbox. Me left with 1200 chips, I say, 'I don't know why your laughing, I'm still going to win this'. I come back and win (sadly he cashes too).

    Interesting hand of the day:

    (I accidently min raised, instead of shoving. Which causes unprecidented damage lol. Saying that, the big stack probably would have called my shove anyway. 

    patwalshhSmall blind 75.0075.002842.50duzza224Big blind 150.00225.003247.50 Your hole cards99   121285Fold    stedafishAll-in 940.001165.000.00carrotttopFold    patwalshhRaise 1655.002820.001187.50duzza224Call 1580.004400.001667.50Flop  K6K   patwalshhCheck    duzza224All-in 1667.506067.500.00patwalshhFold    duzza224Unmatched bet 1667.504400.001667.50duzza224ShowA3   stedafishShow56   Turn  4   River  Q   stedafishWinTwo Pairs, Kings and 6s2820.00 2820.00duzza224WinPair of Kings1580.00 3247.50


    --

    patwalshh


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  • FabraclassFabraclass
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    Introduction - For months I've been wanting to post a thread to track my progress. Having been inspired by various threads, I've finally decided this would be a great place to post it. In this thread I will post my Poker 'career' to date, the highs & lows I've encountered along the way, and regular updates of my day to day progress.  Backstory -  I started playing poker about 3 years ago when I stumbed across Facebook poker. From the moment I played my first hand, I was hooked. As strange as it sounds, it seemed as though it was my destiny to play. I started with the 9 player sit and gos and even though I was playing with play money chips, I felt a purpose.  The two year wait until turning 18 - and legally being able to play began. I can honestly say that the 6 months leading up to my 18th birthday were the longest of my life. I played on a few sites before turning 18 with little success. I knew that I had a long way to go until I'd be a consistant winning player online. So I put my game to work, I read stratergy and watched videos. Desperately trying to improve my game before I could make a substantial deposit when I was finally legal to play. Eventually came my 18th birthday, March 24th of last year. Waking up on my birthday, knowing the constrictions of being 17 had gone - was the best feeling in the world.  For my birthday, myself and 4 friends went to London. Over the course of the weekend I won over £600 in 4 hours of live poker play. I knew good things were ahead. But unbeknown to me, my path to becoming a winning poker player had only just begun.  Initial Playing days -  After the exuberance of my birthday had worn off, I was unsure what to do. I held a firm belief at the time that I was a winning live player, but knew that online poker was a different game entirely. I had just under £1000 in my bank from my birthday, but knew that could soon vanish. I decided upon a $400 deposit on Full Tilt Poker. Within a week of playing $25nl cash, I'd doubled my initial deposit. I felt unbeatable and started taking shots at $50NL and even $100NL. I had little idea of bankroll management at the time. Looking back, the sample size from which I won that money was laughable.  The heater finally wore off, and my previous account balance of $900 had diminished to just $200. I had no idea what to do. I finally found 6 max turbo sit and gos and these became my main game. I was going to college at the time and making a nice amount of money playing them on the side. I'd applied to University and had conditional offers from various institutions to study Business. Over the summer, my plan was to grind the 6 max turbos as a job and enjoy my time off before starting University in September.  After finishing my exams, I began just that. I was the happiest I'd ever been. I had as much financial secruity as a low stakes sng player who'd just finished college could have. I had great friends who I met up and went out with on a regular basis. And after 6 months of hard work, I had a girlfriend. Looking back I laugh, because when I say hard work, I mean hard work. This is the sort of girl, who would send mix signals day in day out. It was 2 months before she would even let me take her on a date. And a further 2 before we kissed. But when we finally became close it was incredible.  Just when my life felt as complete as it could for a 17 year old, it got turned upside down. A couple of weeks into my summer, the site I played on, Full Tilt Poker got shut down by the US department of justice. All players on the site, could no longer access their accounts. You couldn't play poker, you couldn't withdraw your funds. Suddenly my entire liferoll was in limbo. I still had some money in my bank account, but much of which had been spent on my new computer.  A couple failed deposits on different sites later, and my dreams of having a carefree summer was lost. I had lost all the money to my name. I was in limbo. Praying for Full Tilt Poker to reopen.  That summer was the hardest of my life. I lost faith in my ability to play the game that I loved, which in turn caused me to lose faith in myself. I no longer wanted to see my friends, my girlfriend, or even spend time with my family - all because I left like a failure. Slowly, everything I'd worked for over the past year had been taken away from me. I just wanted to sit in my room and loath in my own self pity. I felt as though I had nothing. My relationship with my friends deteriorated. I no longer wanted to do anything or see anyone, I pushed everyone away. My girlfriend wanted to stick by me, but I wanted nothing to do with her. Eventually I broke up with her.  'Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways' - S. Vincent University  -  Eventually August came and I collected my exam results. To my dismay they were good enough for me to study Business Management at Bath Spa University. So with my mind now on University and not poker, I felt a rejuvination. I saw my friends for one last night out before I before I left. The atmosphere was unbelievable, it was as though everyone was beginning a new chapter of their lives - whether it be work, university or travel. The mood was electric and everyone had a great night.  The next day, feeling worse for ware, I moved to Bath. I felt a mixture of emotions but ultimately I was glad summer was over. I was really lucky to be put with great flatmates who I've got on with since day one. Freshers week was incredible. For anyone not familiar, freshers is the first week of University. Essentially it comprises of a week of drinking and socialising. During the next few months I got on with my studies, but I couldn't help but feel as though something was missing.  Fast forward a few months and a few more failed deposits later, my overdraft was not looking healthy. With my poker bankroll on Full Tilt still in limbo, I once again felt disguisted in myself. How can I go from making a healthy amount over thousands of SNG's, to being a complete loser. Looking back, it was my own fault. I was playing cash way outside the restraints of my bankroll. But at the time - losing felt like the worst thing in the world.  Skypoker -  That brings us to December, when I made the transition to Skypoker. I put £15 on the site, and after winning a small tournament, I just had enough of a roll to begin playing the £5 Double or Nothings. To my surprise I was actually winning at them! In the two weeks of December I turned that £15 into over £400. I felt incredible. However, it wasn't the money itself that made me happy. More importantly, it was the belief in myself that the money gave me. After such a painful and low period of my life. A period that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy - I was back. But then Christmas came. I went home during the middle of December and decided not to take my big computer/dual monitors home with me because I'd be going to Mexico for most of the time period. Because I didn't have my dual monitors, I wouldn't be able to mass multi-table the double or nothing's like I was used to. Boredom soon sunk in and I couldn't resist HU/6 Max cash. Running bad and playing worse, I lost most of my bankroll in a couple of days. After the holiday, I went back to University as soon as I could - back to the poker grind. All went well and within a week I was well on track to rebuilding my roll.  I had rebuilt my roll back to over £300. But then Friday the 13th happened. I lost over half my roll. I lost so many coolers in a row, I was in pure disbelief. I lost with AA to KK, QQ to JJ, AK to AJ, AK to AQ about 20 times in the space of two hours. It felt like a bad dream, like I'd wake up any moment. At this point I could have quit. My account still had the same amount as a week prior. Yet I just wanted to escape the pain. It was though I just wanted it to be all over. I lost the rest within 20 minutes playing PLO. So there I was, overdraft limit reached, penniless and in pure dismay. I once again had nothing. The next couple months were a blurr.  March -  Fast forward to March and I was considering selling my entire computer setup. From the 'gaming' desktop to the dual montiors. Everytime I woke up, my computer was there. My datebase of hands, my former graphs, the dual monitors. All for one purpose, poker.  With my money still locked up in Full Tilt Poker, I felt as though it was time for me to give it one last shot. If this wouldn't work, I would quit. I just couldn't put myself through the pain and anguish of gaining so much mentally, and then having it taken away at the blink of an eye. I finally decided to put £100 into my poker account with the intention of playing as many Double or Nothings as I could, praying to succeed.  March proved to be a success. My bankroll grew by the day, and I was soon 12 tabling a mixture of £5.50 and £11 Double or Nothings. About a week into March, I realised I was actually on pace to reach Priority club - something I didn't think was possible at such a low buy in level. During March I played an incredible amount.  March was a long but fulfilling month. By the end I was so sick of SNGs and Poker! I actually made Priority club with a day to spare, even after taking 3 days off during the course of the month. I recieved £280 in rakeback and all the other Priority Club benefits. I was truly overwhelmed. But once again, it wasn't the financial gain that benefitted me the most. It was the sense of acomplishment. I had finally proved to myself that I was a winning poker player. All the self-doubt left me that day. I felt blessed.  'You won't truly be successful until you say, "I dont need that money, because I got it in here.'" April and Beyond - Because I played so many STT's between Jan-March I was eligable to participate in the Team Skypoker tournament. The top 30 players based on volume played from each donomination: cash, mtts and stts - were invited into a tournament with the chance to win a sponsorship package and represent the site. I believe a total of 87 people entered the tournament, and the top 6 would win a sponsorship package.  I had looked forward to the tournament for weeks, telling close friends and family of my oppertunity to represent the site. During the middle of April, the time finally came to play it. I slowly bled chips for the first hour and my hope of a sponsorship deal faided. Just when I thought my chance was over, I got involved in one big pot hitting top pair, top kicker, against my opponents top pair, worse kicker - giving me a double up.  From there, I slowly built up chips. My Jacks held up against KJ and before I knew it, we were down to the final 20. Eventually came the bubble, when the tournament was down to 7 players. With only 6 sponsorship packages, one player would be left empty handed. I had a tough table, with the respectable LOL_Raise to my left. I was in a dominant position, and with the blinds high, I was shoving wide to steal. But then, disaster. My shove was called off and my hand was dominanted, I lost. I was cripped. My chip stack down to a lowly 30,000, with the average around 55,000. I was at serious risk of being the bubble boy. Thoughts of failure were entering my head, and I truly believed I had, once again let my chance slip. However, my aggression paid off and after 3 bet shoving wide, I was once again in a dominant position. LOL_Raise shoved UTG and was called by an opponent with a very similar chip stack. LOL_Raise actually got lucky when his outkicked ace paired the board. It was over. I had actually done it. I had won a Skypoker sponsorship package. After that tournament I felt comfortable in my ability to play poker. However, more importantly, I finally felt comfortable with myself.  Final Thoughts - The Team Skypoker tournament has given me something intangible, something that can never be taken away from me. Even if I never win a hand of poker again, I wouldn't feel a sense of failure like that of before. I'd be happy because if it wasn't for the mistakes I'd previously made, I wouldn't be where I am today, not only in poker - but in life.  'Sometimes, it's the most difficult times that make us grow, gain compassion and empathy and find strength we never realised we had.' Present Day  -  I currently still play the £5.50 and £11 double or nothings, with the intention of moving up through the stakes as my bankroll grows. My goal is to buy a Rolex Datejust by the end of this year as a symbol and reminder to myself - that dedication and hard work can ultimately pay off. I'm currently ranked top 20 for sharkscope 2012 leaderboard 'any game by network - Sky'.  In July I'll be playing the £550 GUKPT, and in September I'll be playing the SPT main event at Dusk Til Dawn. Both paid for under my Sponsorship deal.  I thank you for reading my journey so far. I'll try to keep motivated and update this thread as much as possible and please feel free to post any questions. I look forward to playing on the same table/s as you on the felt.   - Patrick Walsh  (patwalshh)
    Posted by patwalshh
    It really makes me sad to see people referring to themselves as "Failures". Some things work out and some things don't.This applies to everybody. Its important not to let your self esteem be based on whether things go well or don't. The way the poker industry works, means that the vast majority of player won't make money from poker long term. Treat poker as a challenge, and if you make money from poker that is a great achievement . If you don't that is super standard. The most important thing is to enjoy poker, otherwise their is no point in playing.

    Failures in my opinion would be things like, not respecting people and being totally selfish in everything you do.
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  • unknown_usernameunknown_username
    edited May 2012
    In Response to Re: Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey:
    In Response to Patwalshh - My Ongoing Journey : Just read your opening post on this thread. It makes me sad to here people referring to themselves as failures. Some things work out and some things don't work out. This applies to everybody.If you don't make money from poker  that not a failure, the way the industry works means the vast majority of players wont make money long term. My advise would be to treat poker as a challenge, and if you make money that is a great achievement. If you don't that's just standard. Failures is my opinion, would be things like not respecting people and being totally selfish in everything you do
    Posted by Fabraclass
    I fully agree. However, when you feel you've put so much into something, almost to the stage of obsession. Gain everything you feel there is to gain and then to have it taken away from you. It can be very emotionally distressing. 

    I appreciate your input :)
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