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had a small session of 9 tables of NL4 earlier after lunch
So happy Arsenal actually scored a goal ! or two :S
I am actually on the season ticker waiting list for Arsenal and got offerd
two season tickets pre season but I refused.
Lets just say I don't feel that great about Arsenal FC right now being a feeder club
Bearing in mind I had been on the waiting list for 5 years, it couldn't if come at a such a bad time
for what is supposed to be a great club contesting with the best.
I mean the club is so great that they sell their captain and best player to a rival !
now at £85, enough for a hamburger at the emirates !
Lets see what this evening brings
now £105
kids all is good
Sun was shining and the ice cream was cold )
My little one starts big school tomorrow, so it was nice to have a day off work and have some fun messing about with the kids all day.
Anyway played some pokers this evening, won some now at £124
Not much to report really, searching for the forum game again tonight but no one was about
Ended up with Lambert and IDONK on NL4 tables - hihi
ps. Kids are a lttle more confident in my ability to get them a dog now )
I'd have probably just donked my profit off to you anyway.
now £96 -
played a bit spewy -raised river with nut flush on a paired board after tight reg leads !
QQ V KK ! versus random non entity on the table
go mad versus tight reg btn when I 3 bet and shove on oppo 4 bet w/79o ! ownage
thought this hand would change my session but hey sometimes you know you have to check it !
now £121
If this carries on I may have to step up to NL20 and see if I can nick some money off the nit regs !
Mixed in two tables of NL20 2night and now stand at £166
xmas is looking great, and it's only September !
Hopefully this will turn into a brag fred about my kids getting a holiday home in Cyprus for xmas )
See how far we can push this original £50 Friday fun deposit
Thanks for your intrest in my intresting thread )
I would be intrested to know if anyone else is intrested in this disintresting thread or do I have to make it more intresting and maybe talk about random topics such a flower arrnaging to get the masses more involved in my quest.
Even though poker may be just a hostile game played by ego driven men, does this not differ from any other game played by men. Do we only thrive to be cavemen and pound our chests when we bluff the river.
Do we have to drop the bravado and ego to play profitably or does this drive us to be more aggressive, which is a good thing.
Do women have a distinct advantage as they play without bravado or ego.
Women do seem more passive ! Men seem more aggressive !
Is this just sterotyping poker players or is their some truth in it.
Do you have to be aggressive to be a winner ?
Can you play passively and be a winner ?
While watching a programme about Stu Ungar, who was so good it was amazing for that time - now it's just super standard, ok well maybe.
In this programme he gave props to a younger Phil Hellmouth while discussing a hand he played, which just goes to show how much Phil was respected back in the day even by one of the greats.
After this I watched a heads up game between Phil Hellmouth and Tom Dawn.
In the first game Phil got it all in pre flop with AA versus Toms 10's, Tom sucks out with a ten on the turn and Phil berates his play and Tom defends his play saying it's super standard. Everyone laughs at Phil for having a tantrum etc..
Later in a rematch heads up clash Tom actually says looking back it was a bad play with 10's versus Phils range.
In this same match Phil outplays Tom and wins !
Now I have never knocked Phil Hellmouth but I know a lot of people have, but he deserves some respect.
So this thread is supporting the brat "WE LOVE PHIL"
But following on from the ego debate, imo the one flaw Phil has is his ego.
He plays so much to his own ego of wanting to be the best and trying to prove he can beat anyone in any hand - given any situation. You could sit Hellmouth down oop to Phil Ivey in a cash game and Hellmouth would still think he could outplay Ivey! At least for all the poker that I have watched regarding high level cash games, it would seem this is the situation.
Drop the ego Phil, play your A game.
Over n out
run golden
+ little bit of a light spew in certain spot didn't help
my kids wouldn't be so proud
current £125
back to NL10 for a little bit see if I can get some back before I begin my quest into nl20
Hellmouth /> Dwan in MTT's - you can't deny the truth !
cmon Dwan sux at MTT's )
Hellmouth doesn't play nowhere near as much cash poker as Dwan.
Just accept it Hellmouth is better at MTT's and Dwan is a better cash player !
Show some love for the Brat !
Several weeks ago my Mum was diagonosed with pancreatic cancer at age 62.
Now the chance of beating this is very very slim, and we have over the last few weeks come to terms with the fact that she has probably months to live. Even with the treament she is receiving it's not going to add that much on to here life.
Given the fact the treament makes her feel constantly ill it's not what you would call a a great way to see out the rest of your days when your just feeling ill 24/7.
Along with the illness from the treament, she has spiralled into depression. At this point it's the lowest I have ever seen here since being diagonsed.
So we have come to a point where my mum is deciding if she will give up the treatment and hopefully with treatment for the depression she will feel better and at least enjoy the days she had left with us. To give you an idea she doesn't want to do anything at the moment, to a point where she doesn't even get ready or want to go anywhere or see anyone.
The treament only makes her feel worse.
Essentaily she is depressed because of the situation and when she has treament for the cancer she is physically ill, which makes her more depressed.
So my mum has decided to give up the treament and she has our full support.
Even though it means she will have less time with us, we are hoping it will be a better quality of life.
Just hoping she can turn a corner with the depression and she/we can enjoy whatever time she has left with us.
It's very strange because the subject is allways the elephant in the room, and you can't just help feeling down about the whole situation. So when I see my mum it's very difficult to ignore the obvious that she is dieing.
It's something I have had to come to terms with, but it's odd that what I feel more angry about is that she is depressed and not that she has cancer. Because at least if she wasn't depressed we/she could be spending more quality time together.
is this just a selfish thought, probably yes & no.
You hear about people dieing and you think, ok write down a list of the things you want to do before you die and do them.
Sounds simple right, but when that person is depressed and doesn't even want to write a list it's so frustrating.
My mum needs a bit of run good to get better and at least smile again and want to do things.
So hopefully the uppers and counselling will work over the next few weeks and we can get back to normal or at least as normal as we can be.
So.........anyway - enough of that..........thanks for listening....it just feels good to write this down as I don't relly talk about this much and while it's comforting to ignore it and sometimes forget your mum is dieing - it truly never goes away.
...
so sorry for you your family and of course your mum.
it's just about as bad as it gets.
my step-dad died of cancer 8 yrs ago now,and our family had to go through that,the real sad thing being my dad as we all called him,was just about the nicest man you could ever have met,which made it so much harder.
you will get through it m8,in fact by writing it down and posting it as you have,you are already making the 1st small steps in dealing with it.
all you can do is all be there for your mum,as she has always been there for you all,and give her all the love and support she deserves.
try and make the best of the time you have left.hopefully things should now improve somewhat now that your mum is coming off the treatment that she was on.
even now after 8 yrs i wish i could have just 1 day again with my dad,just to do some of the things we loved doing together,either fishing, playing golf,badly,or even watching something stupid that he would have taped off the telly,and missed taping the ending,and even listening to him munching his way through 3 or 4 packets of crisps and really annoying me. lol
one day at a time m8,one day at a time.
dev
went thru a similar situ couple of years ago,i spoke about it on the forum it made me feel better m8
its hard to play with whats happening it seems irrelevent..stay strong rancid
Another hard day, Mum back in hospital overnight. They going to feed her intrevenous, hopefully it will help.
That's right people poker is just a game we enjoy playing, win or lose it's no biggie.
Probably going to be playing some pokerz tonight actually
Helps take my mind off the situation anyway, plus I can't do braindead TV !
thanks
Marc
It's awful news about your mum but an honest, open approach is best beleive me. As for depression, i have suffered from it after my brother's suicide 12 years ago and it has recurred for no reason once. Please consider getting counselling for your mum as these people are fantastic. They will allow your mum to talk until she can see 'solutions' for herself in what she wishes for the coming months. It certainly helped me to get out of my depression. Its not a kick up the pants solution as that does not exist. depression is more complex than this.
I've felt just like you described...not wanting to do anything.It's a strange feeling. Possibly a frank and honest exchange with your gp with mum present may help you form a plan. This period is going to be very difficult for you Marc. it may help to talk to friends too. Try to stand back and see the situation from what you would like to see realistically and how you can bring that about. I'm sure your mum loves you and wants the time ahead to be as positive a time as possible.
Try to enjoy each day as it comes as much as possible.
Yeah depression is very hard to understand - even my Mum gets angry with herself for feeling this way :S
Regarding poker I bubbled FT in min BH, GaryQQQ is still playing on FT so may have a nice update for his thread ) hand that destroyed me - I had AQ & call UTG shove - oppo shows A3 - result +) 3 on the turn grrrrrrrrr ! crippled !
Exit hand shove 4bb after being crippled w/Q7 - called by Q9 - sigh - flop 7JJ ) 9 on turn - sigh
guess my luck run out towards the end _(
Cash challenge thingy- went a bit mad played some NL50 & NL20 for a little while but it was mainly MTT I was playing tonight - playing cash now can't see it changing much ) o I flopped trips 2's ) easy money for the kids ) o no someone flopped a set in another hand - wowza
current £145
Hope it can hep. i can understand the anger thing too. You do feel annoyed with D. I got a good book about it and it helped me to understand why i was angry, constantly tired etc.( I can send the title etc if you like). there are coping mechanisms to learn.
Use the poker to give yourself some down time from the situation. You'll need it. A Dr rec to me taking up a new sport/hobby. I chose golf and it was like 4 hours where all i thought about was getting a ball into a hole and improving on that score in the next round. It gave me breathing space for when i got back to the real world, as it were. My brain would have been frazzled otherwise.
Maybe see ya at DTD tomoz...cheers...
I have gone off on a bit of a slant here but with the £125 of hard earned cash for xmas.
I'am going to take this and play the £5 DYM level for a while, bored of cash so......change is better than a rest )
See if I can make any progress, give it a week and I'll be quickly bored of DYM's )
I haven't played DYM's for an absolute age, so it will be intresting to see how I get on.
Marc
Hi Ranny, only just caught up with this m8, really sorry to hear about your Mum's situation.
I had experience of this a number of years ago when my father in law suffered from deep depression and was so bad that he was admitted to a psychiatric unit for 12 months, sadly to no avail. Really is a terrible illness but to have it coupled with cancer must be horrendous for you all.
Hope the uppers kick in and you can all spend some quality time with her.
All the best m8
Bill